Little Paris

Mind Your Language

English Is A Confusing Language

English is the current lingua franca of international business , science , technology and aviation. But it is indeed a confusing language for foreigners to learn as it contains numerous inconsistencies.

For example , someone once asked that if the plural of box is boxes , why then is the plural of "ox , " "oxen " - and not "oxes". And although the plural of "mouse" is "mice" , yet the plural of "house" is not "hice" [ SIGH....! ]

It's the same thing with "man" . If its plural is always "men" , then we should lobby for the plural of "pan" to be "pen" . And then , there's "foot," the plural of which is "feet." So why isn't the plural of "boot," "beet"?

Then , there are the masculine pronouns "he, his & him," which should logically have, as their feminine equivalents, "she, shis & shim." But, no-o-o!

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out & which an alarm goes off by going on. By the way, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?

Let's face it-proper English is a crazy language. And you still want to send your children to an English school??

In contrast, Malaysian English is simple and straightforward. No beating around the bush...

When giving a customer bad news, for example, the British may take the long & winding road-for example, "I'm sorry, sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want n your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you..." unlike Malaysians hu juz tell it lyk it is : "Sorry, no stock!"

When asking permintion, da British might say "Xcuse me, but do u thnk it wood be possible 4 me 2 enter through dis door?" Malaysians don't waste time.They juz point 2 da door & say, "Can ahhh...?'

When asking someone to make way, the British may say, "Xcuse me, I'd lyk 2 get by. Wood u plz mke way?" Malaysians juz say "S-kew me!"

Malaysians are certainly more direct. When disagreeing on a particular matter, da British might say, "Er, George... I hve 2 stp u der. I understand where u're cmng 4rm, but I really hve to disagree wif wht u said bout' da issue." Malaysians, on the other hand, will not hesitate 2 let u noe their opinion of u : "Eh, u mad , kah?"